just so you know, the whole club saw your tits last night. and booed.
and then he said that some chick told him he danced like an epileptic on crystal meth. he then proceeded to demonstrate this statement, which i can testify is 100% accurate.
Their flight hasn't even left yet and the 'buy food to keep yourself alive' budget is gone on tequila.
why is allison so mad at me??
me and her walked into dans and you yelled "hello my dear alli, you're looking mighty overweight today!".
crap..
also, did you notice that when he quoted your email he used MLA format?
My natural self cock block skills kicked in last night. I could've got on like 2 chicks but i ended up throwing up all over my van instead.
oh don't forget that when we go furniture shopping we have to find a matching bong so put more money in the furniture fund
No one even knew you were hurt until we saw the multiple cuts to prove it, and when we asked what happened all you could say was "I fell out"
So not only did team sweden fail to particpate in any drinking game but i also found puke in my viking helmet this morning.
We were eating hotdog buns dipped in French onion dip in lawn chairs at 4am. That drunk
I dont even care how hung over I am, and how shitty this bus ride will be. That was the best sex of my life and it's a beautiful morning.
You threw a shot glass at the bartender and still managed to convince him to let us drink more. You are my hero.
If drinking had a "new high score" I think I hit it this weekend.
I would say don't do anything I wouldn't do, but we both know I forget about my personal safely when getting laid is on the line
I refuse to go to a doctor for a sex injury, not when I've come so far already
Randomize
