she broke up with me using backstreet boy lyrics
you deserved it if you knew it was backstreet boys.
Is it bad that I stopped wanting to fuck her as soon as I noticed she had dry skin?
I sometimes completely doubt that you're straight.
there's just a random girl here singing about how much she loves fiber
You kept making that girl eat peanuts, saying they were good for her baby..... I don't think she pregnant
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This is like a relationship, I expect to be mind blown at least once a week.
He ate me out. IN THE MORNING. I love less attractive men.
I bet George Washington got SERIOUS head back in his hay day.
I'm texting you the word "cockring" because I feel it hasn't been said enough throughout our friendship.
You dropped a beer and it was like when wilson floated away. Complete with sobbing apologies
Shit, no womder she didn't wanna fuck me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Please remind me tomorrow that I ate a loaf of jimmy johns bread on the toilet 5 mins ago
Last nights hook up turn into a star wars history lesson.. He's luck y he's pretty..
Dude I am a waste of space, I just febreezed myself so I could go out and get lunch
They are like untrained puppies reaking havoc on a newly furnished house. Out of control.
You just compared our vaginas to a newly furnished house...I can dig it.
He ran out to tell us that somebody flooded the bathroom, then went back in there fell on his ass and asked why the floor was wet
Had a moment of weakness, slept with my ex last night
So that's why our room smells like tequila and shame.
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