I don't think your that much of a whore. your like a whore-let. a mini whore.
Came home to a chalk baord that read:" Think like a rapist." Can't say I'm surpirsed.
Well, if your day started with strippers, then we're tied. Otheriwse, I'm winning.
I just saw "i'm bigger then that" as her facebook status. Would it be better to make a fat joke or correct her grammar?
Weekdays seemed more exciting when I had a drinking problem. Like I had something to look forward to at night.
is election day enough of a holiday to justify getting fucked up on a tuesday?
I feel like a fucking princess. Like an heiress of a kingdom of drugs.
No no I got the black eyes when I tried to do a flip off the second deck of a pontoon boat. Actually when I did a flip, it was a success.
Is it weird to say that getting an std with you was kinda romantic?
Romney sounds like a middle school girl and that creepy ass smile makes me want to close my blinds
He yelled "I'm Bruce Springsteen!" when he came. This is why I don't sleep with guys from Jersey.
I'm trying to find some better sex background music so his neighbors don't hate us. This is tedious.
Stop confusing me with every girl you know that doesn't like sex.
Somehow my boobs came up in conversation AGAIN last night and I'm still not getting laid...
party at the soccer house. crumbs in my sexy panties. can't. put. pieces. together.
Randomize
