Question: terrible or awesome when a girl give you head so vigorously that you get a hickey of sorts
The fact that I am sitting home writing a resume while you're out inducing vomiting makes me feel like way more of an adult than I'm ready to be.
Just topless shotgunned a bud light alone. I am about to peer mentor the shit out of these freshmen.
After he convinced me that my friend had died and come back to life, I decided I was having sex with him that night, and that I should lay off the drugs for a while.
Somehow "stranger danger" turned into making out with a 25 year old on burbon street.
Idk yet. Trying to convince him to get a phoenix bird tattoo first
Have I told you recently that I love you, if for no other reason than you make my irresponsible substance abuse look tame by comparison?
So would it be tacky to offer my services as a future attorney as an engagement gift for her?
some people popped out of a houseboat and asked us to their party. their houseboat IS A WEEDBOAT. it is full of weed they grow weed. EVERYWHERE.
I WANT PIZZA BUT I ALSO WANT SELF ESTEEM
BUT LIKE WHO AM I TO EVER CARE ABOUT SELF ESTEEM
He's 30 years old and woke me up for a hand job. Last time I go home with someone I met through Tinder.
You weren't stupid you just made an ass of yourself. It's called a birthday party. That's code for night of regrets.
Don't mind me, I'm just walking 2 miles across campus with no jacket, covered in highlighter, and carrying a hair extension. Gotta love miami!
it's like that time i was drunk at relay for life. but with balloon animals...
he said he's going to burn things and pack his stuff. he may leave tomorrow supposedly but i doubt it
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