when a girl feels in her heart, the way she feels in her vagina, anything is possible.
We met at my place after separate parties but the condom wrapper was red with hearts and said love. Does that count as a romantic date?
I just ate four packages of Swiss Rolls. Being high and on food stamps is AHmazing.
It just gets louder and louder too...dear god. Her poor vagina.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hey. Whatever time u wake up let me know Ur alive. I need my vegas partner... I don't think they let u take corpses on a plane.
Oh my God, that is a gorgeous man. And I wasn't even gay until five minutes ago.
Our 450 pound cab driver smells like McDonalds and sunblock with a touch of vodka. Correction I smell like vodka.
Also, I just realized you seduced me while in a batman onesie... Well done, sir. Well done.
I almost went home with him but then my hydroxycut fell out of my purse at the bar and I ran away
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The problem with drugs is that there's none in this hotel
The problem with drugs is that showing my boobs only gets so much of them
tried to make it look like I had been conscious/awake and out all day when I stumbled into cvs at 6pm to buy plan B
update: I failed
My roommate fed me my birth control pill while I was hungover laying on the couch so that's how my morning has been
of all the things that should kill me, scurvy wont be one of them
3 weeks in a row I've pulled '69' at the deli counter...God is giving me shit for not getting laid in a year....
How was the tequila? Are you making bad decisions yet?
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