I'm bringing in a picture of a stranger on facebook to get my haircut. I have reached a new level of creepy.
This was worse than the time that I shot a bald eagle.
Two girls are doing the worm relatively well on the bar floor after the fact I just saw one puke in the trash
I made my rape whistle into a roach clip device. FRESHMAN YEAR!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I got drunken sympathy for the whales' plight last night and signed up to give $50 monthly to Greenpeace. Calling to cancel was worse than the hangover.
Hear that? That's the wail of a dying whale. Murderer.
This hurricane was the perfect excuse to buy 2 pounds of animal crackers and a case of beer. It's on Sandy.
I'm slightly more gay than I thought. I'd go so far as to say I'm a top.
she's an english major so her sexts are something i look forward to
Idk man, most things I eat are even better than I expected. Like when I drunkenly put mac and cheese on a slice of cheese pizza or when I soberly put mac and cheese into a Taco Bell burrito.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
10/10 dentists agree that he is one bangable mother fucker. hint: i am all of these dentists.
After we had breakup sex it took him longer to say goodbye to my boobs than it did to me...
I need to learn how to not be a fucking liability
do you think that identical twins have the same size junk? i just want to know your opinion before i find out.
i think if a sober person was watching us they would have not thought we were witty
Forget work, lets run away, rob banks, and have kinky sex with fuzzy handcuffs.
IT'S LIKE YOU READ MY MIND.
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