thats the last time I fuck a piece of fruit on camera for him.
It was worth having to clean the cum stains out of the carpet.
I just want you to know how happy I am that you are circumcised.
Theme for your birthday? Beer olympics in S&M costumes? Sounds like a nice little saturday
Yeah thats cool. We can play the alphabet game while doing bumps of coke in the back of his volswagon
The window painters skipped us. They didn't know what to do with the giant SMOKE WEED in the window. So they just skipped it.
So wise, so handsome, so good at oral sex.
We're living together and you don't know if I've seen Titanic?!
Do they mail horrible human being awards or do I have to pick it up or what's the protocol on that shit
You were drinking whiskey from a beer bottle i dont know what you really expected...
He had all the grace of a fucking hippo and the emotional control of a five year old
My dog just ran downstairs with my vibrator in her mouth... during my dad's birthday dinner.
Wasted. And I have 5 pounds of potatoes that I'm responsible for.
These rednecks don't fuck around. This party is completely BYOB and we now have 6 kegs, 3 of which have already been emptied.
My favourite part was when you contorted upside down in the tub and said "I don't want to be upside down"
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