he called to tell me the scratches were still on his back. this was in the summer.. still the best hookup
We're not too concerned with getting her out of jail. We're on a mission for donuts.
she was talking at me constantly for like 20mins. i kept praying for a brain hernia but it kept not happening...
We told our cab driver we'd give him 3 grand if he pit maneuvered you guys in your cab.
Single person behavior: I wanted a cookie but was too lazy to make or go buy any, so I let cookie dough ice cream melt and ate all the chunks. Pantsless.
All I know is that your reaction after this date with him was "I think I did cocaine" so I'm sold on this boy
nothing like walking in the house at 3 am in my panties and a sheer shirt carrying a life sized cardboard dale earnhardt jr
Every single person in NY is either baking, drinking, or photographing their cat. Reporting live from Instagram.
Damn why is there no horse blowjob emoji?
I have a sixth sense for dads free balling in gym shorts
Good friends go out of their way to crop dust your ex not once but twice. I knew we were friends for a reason
Does this mean I have to put a bra on now
yeah the cops just showed up and they got there ass handed to them at beer pong.
All I want to do is lay in my bed and eat hotdogs
Do you think Ashley had her twin sister tag in for our date? The sex was different and I think a mole was missing
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