we just drove by a car that was painted for a grad, it said "you done it!" with a confederate flag bumper sticker next to it. i love kentucky
He kept buying me shots of tequila. I decided to just save myself the half hour of toilet hugging and tell him straight up that I intended on sleeping with him. We got Tacos on the way home with all the money we saved.
There are about 5 pictures of my dog taking a dump on my camera and 20 of Brandon taking one for "comparison" reasons.
It looks alright. The blow up doll is in the microwave, and she has forks in her ass
In their defense you were hugging a watermelon for a good portion of the trip
You were on the drunk bus swinging around on the pole when you decided you were hungry, so you pulled half a bagel out of your pants and ate it. Everyone stared at you, dumbfounded as to where it came from, and cheered
So I pull up to an apartment complex and immediately felt like I was here to get stoned.
It was all going fine until I had to chug that strawberita bud light. That really ended badly.
I got slapped by a drag queen and bitten on the arm by either a random girl or a weird mouth shaped dog. Tough to tell without seeing the teeth
He's wearing my bra and eating a breadstick while jumping on our bed.....
I did all i could do but i woke up smelling like cigars and theres salsa all over my face
Well... This is my last night at the resort. So far, the only thing that has been in my vagina is sand.
Still, being medically ordered to stuff things in your vagina is amazing.
It was horribly awesome. Its like looking at the sun, you know its bad for you but I just couldn't stop looking.
My trash can is full of used condoms and girl scout cookie boxes.
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