Girls gone wild is like the hills, except sexy and it doesnt suck
I tried booty calling last night but apparently he was too tired and wants to meet up tonight. I told him planning defeats the purpose.
I'm going to appeal my grade. Is it better to look studious or slutty?
I apparently texted him "since you're taking time out to think about us. You probably need to think about me getting arrested right now."
Do you know how hard it is to get cum out of a straw hat!?
What a dumb baby whore.
All inclusive resorts are actually just places that livers go to die.
that bad?
u-n-l-i-m-i-t-e-d. f-r-e-e. t-e-q-u-i-l-a.
Your cock deserves a montage
Just to be clear, the only reason you're allowed to scream "COCKTAIL SERVANT" at bartenders is because you have nice tits
How do you explain to a guy that he's like a little puppy dog that you play with, but then leave at the shelter to go home to your German Shepard?
I have a high opinion of you, you smash bitches. Respect.
So his 25th anniversary post of love to his wife was almost verbatim what he said to me last week. Does that mean I win or lose?
I just got dropped off by that cop that pulled you over. Best sex ever! Consider that $140 ticket my birthday present.
he showed me his third nipple on the first date. I might have low to no standards, but my god.
You ripped his router out of the wall and screamed "I have defeated the matrix"
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