babies were throwing up all over the place
The sex was so good, I called my ex during the 2nd time just so he could hear. Is that mean?
i can barely draw a stick figure let alone shave a heart into my pubes
and my attempt at hiding my drunkness from my parents included walking into the wall as soon as they let me into the house.
Showerbowl immediately followed by pullups naked. I feel like fucking Tarzan
Well it involved jumping two nine foot fences. But when you mix alcohol and persistence you can't lose.
shes taking the breakup well, i walked in on her naked passed out wearing a turban with a bag of peanut butter choc chips in hand at 5 in the afternoon.
we shared soup. that is literally the extent of my romantic life right now
My gay card got upgraded to platinum status today.
Its 11am and I'm eating gummi bears and drinking Tennessee honey in my underwear...this is why I'm self employed
He says it takes a lot to subdue the urge to just bury his face in my vagina. Of course, I have absolutely no problem with this.
All this studying of HIV makes me want to have sex with you.
WHEN THE HELL DOES ANYTHING IN OUR LIVES *EVER* GO AS PLANNED???
I'm a shining star this evening. Dancing with a cane in rite aid now. I should be kept under survaillance.
So. Much. Porn.
Randomize
