People are allowed to visit it's just they can't be from Germany and have to wear masks.
I keep pulling short curlies out of my mouth. Not cool
....ANDDD I just became confused during sexting and sent my mother a text describing a "porno-worthy cum shot."
happy birthday! Any relationship between us is now officially illegal.
I probably wouldn't hook up with him if I had to deal with more than his penis. i think cumulatively we are up to a minute of actual conversation this week.
We found him. 8 blocks away from the bars and almost at his parent's house. On the verge of tears.
What can I say, he stumbled upon the key to my heart: orgasms and mac 'n cheese.
Only you would get a date out of getting hit by a car
I wish you could see how much hot sauce and broken glass are in our apartment right now.
I'd rather just be alone, than deal with this bullshit. I just want to be alone. Cats and vibrators never let you down.
Shotgunning beers to finish a midterm project at 3am is a good idea right?
I just saw my 7th grade teacher at the club. We had a pretty good talk over drinks. Turns out we both like dancing on tables.
Like you haven't hit rock bottom until you have had to throw your own turd out a window
Lol woke up with mangoes in bed with me
I had Mac n cheese made with weed butter last night. Epic
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