I just got back to Nicks and I shoul dnot have drank this much when I have to work at 7AM!!!!!
I could give you a full detailed description of 75% of the penises in that room
if he only knew that in between each sext i was puking.
it's like a replay of two fridays ago...except not in a motel and i'm not having sex in the shower.
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I've done nothing but whore my gay ex bf out for the past 48 hours. It's getting weird.
I'm not sending you pictures to jack off to. That's not what friends do
Also I'm sitting home alone with a big ass bowl of marshmallows right now just eating. It's so sad.
I played "in the air tonight" on a drum set made of titties, and I'm not even exaggerating
I will kick you in all of your body parts. All at once.
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Gave up on finding an ashtray.... just started flicking it in my purse.
And regarding bottomless mimosas stopping at 1 pm, there was a chick who drove her car into the back of the bar. Blame that bitch, not you peeing in the koi pond.
I put his pb&j sandwich in my bra and never looked back
Aint no party like a Broke College Girls Eating Stuffed Crust Pizza party
You drunk? Cause I have a terrible idea...
If i'm not ready, make sure i'm alive. Not passed out dead in the shower.
I'll still do breakfast to celebrate the life you've had.
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