Well for starters i'm drinking vodka out of a bell pepper.
he wouldn't shut up and let me sleep
yeah i got into a fight with my man last night
why can't men just shut up and put out?
Ive created a fbook group called "threesome" and invited two girls. Im not going to say a word and just see what happens.
I just heard someone say "gosh-darnit" and they didn't have a southern twang. I worry for New York.
Hungover snowboarding. Puked off the lift and traumatized a group lesson for kids. Crash course on adulthood.
I'm also glad were at the point in our friendship where my vagina talking to you isn't weird
I need to hump something and I know u understand.
The last time I went to Vegas and the sun started to rise, my copilot went home with her nipples pierced.
Have a glass of wine with dinner they said. Your hydrocodone has worn off they said... NOPE
I asked him to change the channel. There was no way I could do reverse cowgirl with golf on.
You threw up on his face 22 hours ago and now he's here holding your hand. I think he likes you.
Ya apperently its not "appropriate" to fuck in the school auditorium
It's three am. I'm drunk in a stairwell in Vegas. My flight leaves at six. Help.
he was really really nice, and I did coke off of his dong that night too
All I remember is being in the middle of the road puking and my bestfriend cheering me on from the passenger seat...
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