peeing in bathroom at penn station and the homeless man next to me is combing his beard with a fork...god I love new york
whats a positive sounding word for "exploit"?
I drank myself into bisexuality again.
thanks for the bloody nose. you probably dont remember, i'm not mad.. only because your boobs are to blame
If a man doesnt have the ability to fuck you well on a small climbing wall, I don't think he deserves you.
Let's just say I've never been so continually aware of my nipples before.
Fate is real! that hot chick, Megan just showed up dressed as jasmine and I'm dressed as Aladdin this is going to be cake
All I know is I got on a table at late night and sang gotta go my own way
Also, I found this app that is basically a tamagochi from the 90's and now I finally have something to keep me busy at work!
lmao he sent me a snapped but i'm afraid to open.
i think i have dick pic PTSD.
we didn't even throw knives this time! it was just the carrot peeler
I'm going to confession for the first time in 6 years. Where do I start, the gay sex or rampant alcoholism?
I have to sleep with him. We're too much alike. It's like clash of the titans, except instead of clashing, he's putting it in me.
i doubt you are even in possession of a crowbar.
I suggest you not find out the hard way
Nows a good time to tell him. Just be like "yeah, I used to bang her too and it didn't work out for us either". He'll understand.
Randomize
