there was this guy running across campus barefoot in the pouring rain stepping in all the puddles. i want his life. and i want to be stripper.
I think I've lost the thrill of being a slut. It's just that the newness has worn off, I think.
I just want to curl up with him and brush his hair and sing love songs together, I think you should come over and end this
i refuse to be around anyone not wearing a sombrero...its cinco de mayo
Whos eating a bunch of acid and watching fireworks tomorrow? This guy. Thats who.
My last google search is "how to build a flamethrower"
how the hell were we supposed to out run the cops in a bus?
I was like kind of drunk but mostly just very enthusiastic about beyonce
I've realized that I'm going to have to wake and bake every morning to make it through the summer without killing someone. This is ridiculous.
I wish I got like a congrats basket for being a responsible sexually active member of society complete with condoms, tissues and lollipops.
Just check with her if girls can get blown, that's all.
Idk man, we spent like 20 mins arguing about the moral ambiguity of fucking in someone else's car
I feel like asking for a towel for after I puke before I puke to be more respectful than jus going outside to puke and coming back inside covered in sweat and tears.
I figure blowing aggressively into a harmonica is better than screaming, "GET THE FUCK AWAY FROM ME YOU SOCIOPATHIC SUCCUBUS" to my sister, in the middle of an auditorium, during my mothers college graduation ceremony.
You ran outside of the party to do the rain dance and swim in puddles
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