He has jerked off in so many socks I am surprised he doesn't have athletes dick
I'm spoon feeding myself tequila for breakfast, should we skip class today?
That's not a good night. A good night is waking up with no skirt, no money, and the imprint of the edge of the bar on your forehead.
He kept stopping sex to whisper in my ear, and the only thing I could understand was "double stuffed oreos"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Do you think you could handle being our babysitter if we roofied ourselves for fun??
So on a scale from 1-10 how gross is it that I used mortuary makeup on my own face?
Fuck you asshole. You cost me cheerleader pussy.
It's amazing where one well timed dick pic can get you in life.
I've never had sex that lasts this long though. It's ridiculous. I feel like I need a Gatorade and a sweatband and a sub.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This is like 50 shades on steroids but with healthy relationship models and mutual respect among all parties involved and lesbian activity.
Ur dad just showed me a tit pic he got omf
I'm drinking apple juice and champagne while watching crossroads..like the classy bitch that i am.
I was not drunk. There was Star Wars, sex, and baby oil.
We damn well better have a snow day tomorrow. We just broke out the rum.
Sorry didnt text you yesterday. had to put restraining order on my ex.
Randomize