Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
I may or may not have started my period at the bar. Good thing I have dark jeans on.
I negotiated the purchase of an entire tray of like 50 jello shots for $8.
Good cause the way I see it, we are down to DAYS left of college so we should have as much naked fun as possible. And Jenga really facilitates that.
We have to talk through the words with friends chat so his gf won't find out
Is it mean to convince my old booty call she used me for sex so I can bang her again before I leave for Denver?
Someone was asleep on the couch next to us and woke up. We paused and he yelled "gentlemen, behold! Sex!"
we used the fire extinguisher you had been cuddling with to decorate the cop car while they were inside arresting everyone
Not sure if it's my shorts, hat, shoes, hair or soul but one of the above just got me drunk again from the glorious aroma of Keystone Light.
He hasn't responded, but he probably just jizzed in his shorts again, so I'll give him time.
I immediately knew he was tripping, he came over with a grocery bag of snow balls and a bike helmet on and asked if I was prepared to die for my country.
I just walked past a guy banging a chick in the back of his car.
Are you opposed to me trying out your penis?
the last thing is remember is that strange guy in the leotard...i woke up in my bed, naked, with a half eaten grilled cheese on my nightstand, a six pack in the fridge, a new pack of cigarettes on my pillow and coke in my purse. apparently i bought some drugs, shopped and cooked. typical.
I think I accidentally got a sugar daddy but I was already planning on sleeping with him so I’m going to see where this goes
Randomize