My milkshake brings 85 to 90 percent of the boys to the yard
He knows as soon as he hits chameleon eye status drunk, he is guaranteed to piss the bed we NEED to push him there
No longer allowed at circus circus apparently fuvking in the elevator is frowned upon.
Strike three, the fat brides maid they call shit puker also has herpes.
It's the building I live in, they were lucky I was wearing clothes at all
I think he should just go away to a small penis island and never come back
I haven't included my nuts in a shave since the Shaq/kobe Lakers era. I gave my self the ol full court press in order to change the tempo.
I have banged to "The Emperor's New Groove" way more than could possibly be reasonable.
I think the sex rug burn on my back is infected, can you check it out when you get home?
I think I'm pregnant again.
or as we call it, thursday.
I'm only coming over if you have cocaine or a snickers bar
Hey kevin, it's Ashlee. I have been trying to get ahold of you. Your pledge gave me your number. I really wanted to apologize for shitting in your car I'll buy new upholstery or pay to have it shampooed if needed. I'm so embarrassed.
Can I just buy you sex toys as a wedding gift? Bc I’m here for that and you
I told you that we shouldn't have sex. You said "its okay I already saw you pee" apparently that was convincing
oh he pulled my dick out. wanna come over after he leaves
GET OFF YOUR PHONE
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