oh and i really hope miley falls off this mountain she is climbing
My life is like a Sweet Valley High book but with lots of alcohol.
you pissed in the sink and didnt realize it until it was time to wash your hands
sleazy september. first one with mono loses.
There was a photo of his face glued to a lifesize Kim Kardashian cutout. By the end of the night he was doing shots out of medicine cups and making everybody hug it goodbye.
its like..once you have one emotional drunk night, you can't stop. i feel like i have to end every drunken night in tears and i dont think my roommates think it's heartwarming anymore
Haha! I've never met his girlfriend, so my main focus will be not saying,"you're the only person in this room that doesn't know what my vagina feels like."
I'm gonna do some tripping... In the direction of balls
What is the current exchange rate for ramen to jello shots?
He looks like a fat version of lurch from the adams family and smells like fritos. This is not the caliber man I want pleasuring himself to the thought of me!
I just remembered something. Did we really all flash the cab driver to get half off?
You don't even know. The entire marching band thinks I'm an alcoholic.
I think sunday funday got a little out of control. There is cheese slices and BBQ sauce all over the roof and 4 empty bottles of vodka in my room.
can you tell me why i woke up in a diaper and combat boots?
we found her. shes in the bathtub full of raw pasta. i dont even know...
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