I tried watching the view, i got through 8 minutes. That is probably a world record.
They always sound like a bunch of chickens.
You talked to that cop for like 15 minutes and when you got back, you told us you were "networking".
i just entered cocaine into my calorie counter.
Nothing ruins a good sext like too many emoticons
i'm sober ask me anything about the civil war
He was standing in the front door with a kareoke machine yelling at the neighbors as the unloaded their van
dude I'm not 100% but I think your mom is sexting me.
For the amount of money I just spent on my dogs toe, I could have fucked the entire B squad at a low end strip club.
He just asked me if he's allowed to flirt with me. That's how whipped he is.
The nausea has returned and I can't handle such things to exit my body so violently
this is the last time i am going to a 7am booty call
Sorry, that was mean and I didn't mean it. I'm just mad at condoms
I wanna hang out. The cats don't talk back.
Do you think if I had a tempurpedic bed he would still be able to feel me fingering myself after we have sex?
I THINK HE DOES. OMG!!!!! OMG I FUCKED A GUY W A FAKE LEG AND I DIDN'T EVEN KNOW!!!!!!????!!!!!!!!!
Randomize
