Your dick is once again the conversation topic.
my co-worker, his best friend who also works with us, an my baby daddy, ive turned love triangle into a retarded shape with to many sides to pronounce
Just drive me around campus, I will be able to smell their innocence.
I don't care what we do tonight, as long as it makes me forget that my boyfriend just told me he likes taking it up the ass from big guys dressed as construction workers
So I found "Fat chicks in saran wrap" in my search history.
That's all you talk about when you are wasted.
I'm sober. Being kissed by a chick with a llama puppet. Shoot me now.
I can't believe she made out with my 15 year old brother. That kid can seriously pull.
the other day i was so high i found pages and pages of pictures of HD hamburgers and patriotic music. bong rips for merica.
Here is your half hour reminder. Meet you at emergency room.
I hoped the great care he put into rolling a blunt would translate to my vagina.
She's legally too young to drink and was making out with a guy who is ethically too old to drink.
It was like in the Christmas carol when the guy pulls his robe back and 2 small children appear... except this time it was a massive scrotum
I was passed out in a bathroom stall. Of course im going to look like shit
We are actually the same person except with opposite genitalia, which are both incredible.
he had to stop me from eating snow off the street on the way back to pick up our cars. that's how hungover i am.
Randomize
