LETS GET FUCKED UP IN ONESIES TONIGHT.
I worry about you sometimes...
you made pancakes with beer, you said they were good. then you threw up 15 minutes later
I returned the dress. When they asked for the reason for return I said, 'I don't deserve to wear white'.
Dude give me 4 good reasons we shouldn't trade girlfriends tonight
Thanks, girl! That means a lot. I can't wait to share my jail stories with you over salad and cupcakes.
Time is so short and I miss you. (I just watched that commercial where the people all laugh and get older and die.)
Thanks to you and Ketel One I now have a court summons with the actual word "frolicking" on it.
What's the place called?
I searched "county" on google, but....there's a lot of results
I just told a bottle to be chill
and meant it
They only searched every other person. But I sacrificed myself to get our vodka across the border
Serious concern: will TSA confiscate my bondage rope?
I love that there are toys on the counter. Coffee, tea, wine bottles, gag ball, and handcuffs.
My kitchen gets me.
Mark my words I will never date another cop again. I don't care if he's JESUS.
Took my nervous poop earlier then expected it's gonna be a good day
The only food I have to eat is weed gummies and magic mushrooms... This is peak 34
Randomize
