Uhhh...do I owe you any money? Or an apology? Or anything?
were not allowed back there because i puked on the waitresses foot while trying to order another round. for myself.
i just caught my roommate coming out of the bathroom half naked with a surge protector. he told me he didn't wanna talk about it.
Pre-St Patricks Day Log: Threw up across a 14ft radius, this is why the irish dont drink tequila
This is the last pregnancy scare i've had since i was 12 and i thought you could get pregnant from masturbating.
they named it eva bongoria. i had to hit it based on the name alone.
i had to cut you off after you shoved a bunch of bottle caps in your mouth and pretended you had braces.
Just been one of those weeks where alcohol out weighs friendship
yea i really dont care about the sex, i just want him to eat my vag. He has to be good at because of his tremors.
I need to stop getting in the car with my dad when im rolling balls. I think he's starting to notice my eyes aren't usually completely pupil
He has a bed frame and a headboard.... That match his dresser and nightstand...
Hahah. That's good.
I feel like you don't understand the severity with which this weirds me out...
BTW car sex works all the muscle groups. Just sayin. Legs/butt are sore as are arms, back and core.
I could fuck to npr.
I was taking a nap and she comes in wo/ pants, gets up on the bed and mounts my face while watching Weeds on Netflix. I'm okay with it, but at least let me wake up first.
I think its a little fucked up she invited you to her wedding, are you going?
There is a lot of acid in my drugs right now
....ill put you down as a no then
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