Charles is a playa. And I don't mean the spanish word for beach.
turns out they were just sand fleas, not crabs.. thank you random mexican girl from padre who's name i can't pronounce
Is it bad that I had sex with another guy on my boyfriend's bed while he's out of town?
Just flip the mattress, it erases all
Done and done
Breaking personal boundaries is my trademark
If you can't accept "I'm sorry I was mean to you" bjs from 19 year old girls, then who can you
she said I was laying next to a garbage can in the subway doing key bumps and screaming "its my fucking birthday" repeatedly
We were eating hotdog buns dipped in French onion dip in lawn chairs at 4am. That drunk
It's 2:30 on a Friday afternoon. It's snowing and must be about 20 degrees outside. I'm sitting in this class with 300 people using up every ounce of energy and willpower not to puke all over the girl in front of me. This has got to stop.
From what I can tell at a cursory glance, it seems that last night I fell asleep on string cheese and it melted into my bra.
How do I convince my friend not to get tattoo tributes to her cats?
WHO DOES THAT
I told her it'd send up tons of red flags and she responded by telling me they're her babies. And she's sober.
Do you want to go soon I'm overthinking life and my butthole again
Well he waved at me as he was leaving so he def noticed the staring, and by staring i mean blatant eye fucking from across the bar..
We ended the night eating peanutbutter with our hands and smoking cigarettes in the house at 4am. Fucking Everclear, man.
My manager gave me an envelope with money in it before he had vacation, and when I asked what it was for, he said it will be his bail money.
I'm going to blackout. I realize this
Randomize
