i said i was sorry for his girlfriend's cancer diagnosis and he said "easy come, easy go" and tried to fuck me
When he went down on me, I saw his bald spot... It completely ruined the experience
he got a charlie horse midthrust which triggered my orgasm we're still sorting this out.
he was cradling you in his arms feeding you rum straight from the bottle and you kept sucking his fingers.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I recommend just blowing him. It's always the way to go.
Under someone's bed. Not sure whose. I think they're sleeping in it.
This girl just swallowed a pealed banana whole. I'm not worthy.
So my nipple piercings were only $20 because it's breast cancer awareness month. Fuck yes!
you 2 were alone in the living room and the dog walked in and you started yelling what are all these people doing in here
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We walked in and someone handed her an unopened bottle of jack with her name on it. She's like a drunken celebrity.
I would steal a car if I knew it had wheat thins in it
is it necessary to steal the whole car?
Ted is on HBO in 20 minutes...not sure if this or the drunken dance party I had at the bar to a N*SYNC Christmas song 20 minutes ago is the highlight of my week so far.
Went home with a male stripper who looked like Justin Timberlake.. I started singing cry me a river mid sex. When he sang along I fell in love
I just used a box o wine to refill a bottle o wine to more effectively drunk clean
She flirted with a pilot and a frat boy at the airport in Vegas and told our bartender his mask matched her panties so yeah I’d say she’s rebounding from the divorce
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