the cure to his relationship is in or around my vagina.
What I'm saying is Afghanistan is America's sexually contracted disease.
I hope no one judges me for becoming a facebook fan of "Adderall" at 5:49 AM...
you should give me head with plastic fangs in
i think he saw me take a picture of his dick
I'm not making any promises. But if I start throwing food at you, just go with it.
I think not having bongs in close range is good for my academia
Screw them and thier engaged asses. I've got liquor to drink and boys I don't know to make out with.
By 11 pm the pants were off and there was no turning back. But on the bright side, you promised me your CDs when you died, you even signed a napkin saying so.
I'm dressed as a caveman and drunk so that's not really an option
i was on the fire escape while he ate me out for a while before i realized he had shut the door behind us and locked us out and i proceeded to climb down the stairs and climb back into the party through the window.
i can only hope to be on your level one day.
Stealing, and booze. If only you added meaningless sex with random people you would have wrapped all your life passions together
still can't believe dude took a personal call while he was balls deep in my mouth.
Like people might wonder why I put up with your puns. You give good head and play with my hair
Can't talk, ducks in the car
Randomize
