you don't remember? you called me at 330 crying because you were in the middle of having sex with corey and forgot his name. all you kept saying was i'm a drunk bitch.
the three of them together have enough kids to fill a barney live audience.
You act like this is the first time I literally thought I was invisible.
I left you pizza on the porch. I didn't want to wake you, if you were passed out on the bathroom floor again. Sorry if it's cold.
He compliments me like a gay guy and fucks me like a starved nympho. I'm in love.
I had to jump out of her car while it was moving enough said
all I wanna do is swim in an Olympic sized pool of Gatorade and tylenol.
Oh you know..Chillin with your dad.
With a fannypack full of drugs.
I was going to learn how to knit but I got high instead.
Next guy I fuck must be a cowboy
The parents I babysit for are at this orgy. I need to leave.
I want to bone him until his eyes fall out
Those boxers don't belong to me anymore. They belong to the desert surrounding Phoenix.
So I paid Bumble $10 to see who liked my profile for a month. Cheap, easy dick. It's all about the economics, yo.
Why is there a pair of panties on my front lawn?
Randomize
