ill give you a foot job if you come over before 4
Is it gay to rub my penis between my butt cheeks and pretend that they're tits?
Wow! You need to get laid.
Who is John, and why is his named carved into our toilet?
I don't remember. I remember laying in the trunk of a car. For hours.
No... No really he actually thought the condom was meant for his hand...
Let's be honest. I make up for my well below average sized penis with a great personality and a possibly successful future
You made her yell her own name while you were fucking so that you would remember it in the morning.
Some girl just walked passed me, said "fuck yeah!" and is now crawling up the stairs
Apparently when your theatre teacher asks who the best actor of our time is, Nicolas Cage is not the right answer.
Great sex, the promise of us mixing our excellent genetics in the future, and access to drugs are mainly what's holding this relationship together at the moment
I have poison ivy and a broken finger. Don't have a threesome in the woods.
Do you know anyone else that comes home with unexplainable injuries as many nights a week as we do?
I would be down to associate sex w taco bell
Last thing googled on my laptop last night was vagina chaffing. What the fuck?
I don't actually like you. I just want to hook up with you.
I'm fine with that
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