she said my body looked tiny like it was a bad thing and then didn't even mention how great my tits look. it's like we're not even friends.
I think I ruined Robin and Mikes anniversary. I walked in on them fucking, accidentally broke the necklace he gave her, and I stole the keg from their party. Not in that order
and then he proceeded to take what he called, a whip cream shower.
She has a facebook friends list called oops. theres 33 people in it. she said its all the guys she regrets fucking.
Although, to be fair, I am both willing and going to lick marshmallow fluff off of your dick.
my liver gets a handicap on account of the whole being diseased thing
I'm FaceTiming Pizza Hut.
Then that means he's outwardly conservative. Inwardly he's a total gay horndog. He's like a spy that can ruin conservative plans.
I want to change all my life goals to that.
He will be forever remembered as "birthday failure" ...Got him to pierce his tongue in my bathroom, but not sleep with me......
Let's go. I'm waiting for my time to shine among the stars of never never land. Make sure you bring my Peter Pan costume this time. Shit's bout to get real glittery.
So last night took an interesting turn.. Never thought I'd say I had to pick up my glasses off the floor of a strip club
I woke up in the basement of a pizza restaurant... I would say the tequila hit me pretty hard.
Drink drank drunk tankkkkn, LETS GO
i accidentally gave my stepdad ketamine so id say it was a fun weekend.
His parents then knew me as the blackout who took care of him and stole his watch
Randomize
