meet me in the bathroom in 10 mins.
wait what? who are you hooking up with in the bathroom?!
aww shit wrong text.
I called you to phone bone last night, but you were out with your boring friends playing video games
seems the shocker is way more shocking if u get the fingers wrong
my mom just poured a water bottle of wine to take my dog on a walk...
This might sound awkward, but can I borrow a dildo for class?
OH BABY IM HERE AND IN A BLANKET FORT
COME TO THE BLANKET FORT
Just found a condom on my floor from last weekend. 2/2. The scavenger hunt is over.
I'm trying to make sure he doesn't drown in the toilet. Because I'm a nice lady.
Desperate times call for desperate measures. But he promised me no small talk so that was nice
whenever i get involved w someone i'm gonna give you their number to testify to the fact that they should not fall in love with me
Did you ever hear the story about the time I did blow in a bar bathroom with the #1 ranked golfer in the world?
Maybe if you would fuck your boss you would get string cheese too
sexting just seems like too much work right now.
I'm completely creeped out. He's dressed as me. And thinks it's funny.
Will exercising make me less horny?
Randomize
