My brain says no but my pants say off.
They say rihanna has been dating several mets players. They go on to say that she feels safe with them because they can't beat anybody.
hey bro how do you do that fake vagina thing with the tp roll? im bored.
she came to the game with a camelback filled with booze. except it was only the bag part so she duct taped to her back
Its 6 am and me and the girl in the next apartment have been taking turns puking and yelling "never agaaaain" thru the walls.
this is not real life
it never is. after midnight never counts.
You can't possibly imagine how much I miss you. At least I'll always have that hidden folder in my computer.
Liz is crying about burritos again.
I was expecting it to be of the "I am your vagina's reckoning" caliber.
IM FEEDING MY CAT ALL THE HAM
Did you put pizza in my boxers last night?
I left you 4 hours ago. Have you been walking around with shit in your pants all day?
I round house kicked her emotions in the face
I woke up with jello shots in pant pockets so I must've had fun
It still amazes me Mike had to have neck surgery after eating me out so much.
Is it too much to ask to have a life partner who has both male and female sex organs that looks cute and sounds like a female Antonio Banderas and likes to get weird?
Randomize
