$4 taco and $400 parking ticket. i am not a cheap date.
I know right? mind you this is the same woman who told me when I was 12 that oral sex just meant talking dirty
i think of them as a grilled chicken salad and a fried chicken biscuit. obviously Amy is better for me, but when i'm eating her all i can think about is how much better the blonde must taste.
he drove an hour to get eggs with me not even a blow job, just eggs.
I hope this doesn't change things. I feel that me being a minor made it more exciting.
Yeah he's still asleep. I washed the blender out. He tried to make a ham-shake. Lets wait until after break to have that talk. I kind of want to see where this goes.
So. Much. Sex. I feel like i ran a marathon then someone kicked me in the vagina. Soo worth it
She is banging on the liquor store door begging them to let her come in.
I want him to rain dance my fallopian tubes.
Why would I send you a picture of it when I could just steal the gnome and put it in your bed with you? Admit it, he looks just like gnomeo!
LinkedIn just suggested I might know the guy I caught my wife fucking.
I made out with a dude last night who has an ex wife. Is this what post grad life is about?
dude new orleans is fucking wild these two guys just performed dueling banjos except they were actually fighting with the banjos
One lesson I've learned so far from college: You've always got time for one more shot. Always
What's a really polite way of saying "you have gravely overestimated the value of your vagina?"
Randomize
