I wish there was a "friends who have gained the most weight since high school" filter on facebook for when I am feeling fat.
Watching a deaf couple have an argument in the mall. Can't bring myself to look away.
So... he formspringed me a link to every nude pic ive taken since he 8th grade. ive evolved nicely. but im nervous as to how this a website.
I plan on gettn treatment center drunk
I'm pretty sure this is how polyamorous relationships begin.
My boss walked in on me puking in the urinal while taking a piss. Sunday funday is eroding my last shred of credibility at work.
Then again, I'm single and napping with a stuffed yoda doll...so I'm not the world's authority on shit.
Need you on the dancefloor. Hungry and lonely.
buying a tattoo gun on ebay just sounded like a good idea at the time idk man
First you say "it can't get any worse" and the next thing you know you've shat yourself on Christmas Eve.
Star Trek does not adequately answer all the questions that I have about alien genitals
She tried to sing jingle balls while blowing me
I'm drunk doing an ab workout. I can only hope I make it to bed tonight.
I'm sorry about the spring break comment. I won't make anymore pornos, I promise.
We were fucking in the bedroom then we heard Sports center on in the living room. He stopped midfuck when I started celebrating that my team won over his
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