you definitely made a grilled cheese using your iron..
ya and it worked didnt it??
i dont know what it was but it was definately NOT a vagina
You're breaking my vagina 4 times a day I reserve the right to know your middle name.
Also, the zoloft kicked in and I can't get an erection anymore. So I'm depressed.
nothing says roomie bonding better than a sunday shroom trip.
This is the second time in a week I've woken up with your bra in my bed and I've had to sit and think about how it happened.
That place is a DUI and an STD waiting to happen. I think I'll pass.
I'M ALSO PLAYING VIDEO GAMES AND THINKING ABOUT ORDERING A PJIZZA. I'M NOT SURE WHAT MY MUSTACHE WANTS.
Got laid in my rudolph onesie for the second year in a row. New tradition? Absolutely.
You were wearing a cookie monster onesie and telling everyone you were actually the sausage monster..
On the bright side I still got laid
Right now you and beer are my only friends.
I have his gate key so know he has to see me again.
I'm just blindly tossing my dick into whatever comes my way.
I legit measured his penis against my chapstick and it was too close to call. So that was my night.
I put on a face mask and masturbated for an hour... my face now has a green tint
Randomize
