its like randi wears special contacts, but instead of colors they make her eyes say "I want cock"
That level of neurosis does not find love outside of Grey's Anatomy.
Things I've learned: after you move in with a girl it's much less satisfying to wipe your dick on her sheets after sex because now they're your sheets too
told my boyfriend i was a virgin so he wouldnt feel bad since he is. now hes asking why his dick is so itchy. should i tell him why?
i don't see why you should, it's not like you told the other guys with the itchy dicks.
No matter how fun it seemed the night before you will always regret taking those pictures, you will always regret eating as much as you did, but you will never regret the great lengths you had to got to get those bruises.
well yea, now i know i won't get hair in my teeth...
I just read the lonely terrorist on nwa had 40 more friends than me on facebook
the last thing i remember is inserting the sippy stray into the jack daniel's.
If you see my mugshot on the news tomorrow, its not what you think
dude you said you were going to be a human flag and climbed the telephone pole and fell in front of a car
Will the fact that I have 4 boob hickies add to or take away from tonight's outfit?
So lets not base feelings on vagina tingles
Had the best sex Thursday night then Friday night I met his girlfriend. The worst thing is we became friends like she gave me her number.
i think i passed out for a few seconds while we were having sex but he didnt notice...
....I just did my boss
I love you. And I will hold your hand as we skip on the road to hell.
Randomize
