Whod you bang
Instead of a promise ring i got my clit peirced, its a promise that ill always give you ass! =]
the boobs are fake... i feel like i just found out santa isn't real.
Last night when I was hammered I set a reminder to tell you that your boobs are my favorite ones in the world, so this is me giving you that message.
I feel like I would bang a guy with a dick piercing just to say I have...like climbing a huge mountain or somethig
He has a really nice penis but its like a model that wasn't built to scale
For the record, chili cheese fritos are not a chaser.
im trying to stop thinking of him and his amazing dick. every time i do i snap myself with a rubber band. classical conditioning at its finest...and you said i wouldnt learn anything from psychology.
She tried to gratify me left handed. Let's just say I've been placed on the 15 day DL.
Binging muscle relaxers because when ur 33 you can no longer SHAKE IT LIKE A POLAROID PICTURE for 2hrs w/o consequences. Fuck you, Age.
That's why my New Years resolution was no more blondes. They're all bad news
Cocaine is ok on a cleanse, right?
he's a mother fucking interior design major!! we boned and fell asleep and now we're laying in bed discussing what color i should paint my room. i'm marrying him
the sex got boring after the first three hours
holy shit
My younger brother asked me "to stop fucking his girlfriends older sisters"
Randomize