If lil wayne asked you to lick him like a lollipop I feel that you would willingly oblige.
Unfortunately I think I would lick most anyone's lollipop.
It's your form of community service; servicing the greater SDSU area.
just had to take a 4 hour nap to write a one page paper. its obviously the week after winter break.
He poured syrup on all those broken dishes because "syrup is magical, and by the time we wake up, they'll be fixed."
i'm going through an 80s music phase. and by phase i mean i will only have sex to white snake
Is it penis luge time yet?
We tried lying really still and being really quiet so that he wouldn't notice us before he left the room. Forgot about the glow in the dark condom.
So I'm sitting at my desk and Thunderstruck came on my iPod. I then proceeded to drink coffee every time I heard thunderstruck. Who says you don't remember anything from college?
My mom just found my nipple clamps...... oh God why....
if the furniture in my bedroom wasn't shape shifting... this would be a different story.
Nautical themed porn is also great bc someone usually wears a captains hat
It's 1pm, she's in the shower, I don't have the guts tell her I wasn't her blind date. Someone got stood up.
Well my summer has already been productive. I partially caused a divorce.
Omg cinnamon bun Oreos. Thanks weed
HIS DICK IS GLORIOUS AND I WANT TO RIDE IT TO VALHALLA
My cats name is now jello shot. How much do you love me right now?
Randomize