Yeah, I tried playing the "see how long he can stay inside of me" game.. And I lost.
I just remember getting him back by licking the window on his truck.
Hopefully. Play it cool. Bust out a few jokes. Chew with your mouth closed and show your boobs.
New rule : you aren't allowed anything . Ever .
The great thing about vietnam is that if I'm drunk during the day people just think I'm being white
Are you still goin to the xmas party?
Yaaaa why?
Jus making sure i will have nice people i know to put a blanket over me when i pass out in the field .
the night probably should have been over when the guy let her fill out my mechanical bull waver for me because i couldn't read
It's been this way for a few days. I had chick fil a on Friday so this could be an attack from the Gay Gods as punishment.
i was asked to be gay of honor by three different girls and NONE of the groomsmen at any of the weddings is open to experimenting. i mean whats the point then.
I have bruises all over my legs. Did I hit a car with my bike last night?
Ohhh the usual. Laying in bed reflecting on my decisions
I did it again.
I drunk texted John McCain.
What??! Dude I'm not having you barging in at like 2 am smelling of cigarettes and disappointment to sleep on my couch and then have an awkward morning with my wife while I'm at work.
Touché sir
I just wiped my butthole and there was glitter down there.
My dad just invited me to smoke a blunt with him. Parent-child bonding at its finest (and highest).
Randomize
