So I had sex with him again. He's still got it. Not chlamydia, he got rid of that.
she's in the bathroom. spitting in the trashcan. not throwing up. just spitting and singing bad romance by lady gaga.
thatta girl
i have a new found respect for you. the amount of people you must have cockblocked last night is amazing
say it with me now .. the "golden" penis. his nickname does not disappoint.
Drunk me thinks I can light up a cig anywhere, sober me finds this hilarious and highly irresponsible. The grocery store is not a bar.
I know this request is pointless but you two please try to keep the drinking and drug use to a minimal, I have bail money so write my number on your arm and a "if found call", wear a life jacket and act like a responsible 28 year old please.
It was a cry at the bar alone type of night, served with a side of passing out facedown in my nachos.
by the end of the night two people were passed out at the table, three on the couches, and one in the bathroom. it looked like someone pumped sleeping gas into the middle of a dinner party.
Responsibility: Hiding your beer when your DWI clients who are out on bond come to talk to you at bars.
World Cup Drinking Game: Take a shot every time they call a foul for something we don't understand. Gotta risk it to get the biscuit.
Hydrocodon makes you feel like a fairy made out of pudding
You don't get to call me bro after you've had your dick in me.
I have never been that aroused while laughing my ass off in my life
I FOUND A VIBRATOR IN MY BABY BROTHERS ROOM. IM FREAKIN OUT MAN ITS BIGGER THEN MINE
put it back and chill out ok
NO FUCK HES 15 WHO EVEN SOLD HIM THAT HES A BABY
You know you have an interesting job when you go to work and have to Google search "How to get poop out of a dryer".
Randomize
