Apparently every Tri-Delt knows what I did and I am blacklisted from ever dating anyone in that house.
Well ya you lied, told her you cared, took her virginity and then broke up with her at Christies Toy Box.
I honestly thought the dildo was a nice parting gift.
it was 6 in the morning, and you cried until i put mulan in. then you proceeded to say every word, not to mention sing along... stop drinking.
I'm reducing my diet to vodka and rice cakes.
no, forget the keg and come see this. prego pants here is dunking chicken nuggets into pudding and crying over a cat show on animal planet.
Swear to god this chicks brother got let out of jail for the weekend for the sole purpose of cock blocking me
My neighbors are outside blasting Hootie and the Blowfish while drunkenly hitting a stump with a hammer. I could get used to this.
I can't break up with him, I ran the math. Taking into account his 7 inch penis and the standard deviation from average, almost 90% of guys should have a smaller penis than he does.
Really? Penis math? This is why guys shouldn't date female engineers.
see these eyes, they just want to bone and go to sleep.
After we were done the second time she turned to me and called me a Hardcore Armadillo. Also, her O face involves crossed eyes. You tell me.
We're looking for the removeable roof from her Miata. Winner gets a 40.
Sorry I couldn't make it...got a scrambled voicemail, all I heard was "Bring the dildo"
He's beautiful. His facial hair makes me wanna cum in it
Ew, no. But yeah I feel the same
so I may or may not have had intense sex to mozart's greatest hits on vinyl... I don't know if I should be proud or just really disappointed in my nerdness
I'm a fuck boy trapped in a single mom's body.
The neighborhood cougar just purred at me while I was doing yard work. I’m terrified and tumescent
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