it was worse than that time i tried giving evan head 4 days post nose job.
he made me stop in the middle of the blowjob to turn the tv towrds him. i then proceeded when he stopped me again to get him the remote. fuck me.
My cousin just told me i smelled good. She must like the smell of cum.
whore
Everyone is in jail. I'll see what i can do though
Most of the time people just stick whatever they want in my mouth. Thanks for letting me decide this time
I asked my mom if I was the drunkest one in the room. With 8 days till I go back to school, I couldn't care less about being shitfaced at a baptism
She came to college a virgin and left on court order. We ruined her.
I just won't go as hard tonight. Four dollar ladies night drink or drown is not a good idea for me. I like to get my money's worth.
I know what youre going to say and vodka only explains half of my sitation
i wish i had a super power and that that super power was shooting out mdma from my fingertips or something
Her boobs felt like beanie babies from heaven
So I vote that we skip the bowling and just go straight to destroying our livers.
I remember because you made a pirate noise when you came.
Seriously, don't even. "Hi, have I seen you half naked covered in bright red body paint on the internet?" is NOT acceptable water-cooler chit-chat.
Aw.
The name of tonight's festivities is hereby decreed to be the "Honey Boo Boo Hootenanny".
Randomize
