They should make Glad Forceflex condoms.
These old people don't even realize they're giving me weed money for shoveling snow.
Hold on there are flying pancakes I can't handle this right now
You Were screaming "Im trying to get it in" and "stop cock blocking" while i threw you in the car
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
hung over. covered in somebodies makeup. and ready to drink.
She has either a C-Section scar or a bullet wound, I can't quite tell
If I don't have hickies that last till tuesday, I didn't do this weekend right
Plus now I feel weird sleeping with you. It's like shooting a three legged deer. It's already at a disadvantage and couldn't get what it's full potential deserves.
Just asked my roommate if she needs one of my old pill bottles to hold her weed during our move tomorrow. What has grad school done to me?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
HOLY SHIT. I JUST FOUND OUT THAT THE KARL/RORY BASEBALL FIGHT THAT RORY LOST WAS 2 YEARS AGO TODAY. RIP KARL'S DICK.
I should be trashily making out with an air force cadet in the beach volleyball court by now
Costco (TM). Making alcoholism affordable!
I guess you never know how much of an impact you have on someone until you sleep with their cousin
So anyway, I'm just floating along life with my vibrator and low expectations.
Look at us. Planning our business meeting. Including snacks like shrooms & trail mix.
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