Hey sorry i havent responded. i threw up on my phone while i was sleeping
Dork........ .......... .. . ...... ........... .. . ... ...... .. . .... ..... .. .... ... .......... .... . . ..... Yeah its morse code, no big deal
Well to be completely honest its more of a 'i wanna do things to you that your parents would not enjoy hearing about' mood
But I don't consider them one night stands. They're auditions.
You also had the stripper slap the shit out of me for not having any money....remember that?
guess who has a date tonight
look at you growing up, going on dates before she hops into bed
Just had a dream about an abnormally large bottle of tequila. No more depressed drinking for me.
I stumbled into my living room at 4 a.m. to find him hurling my laptop across the room and his pants around his ankles. Clearly his night didn't go as planned.
Call me old-fashioned, but I don't think the words, "Finger my ass" should find their way into casual conversation.
We had 15 min before last call. Exact quote "let's see how drunk we can get."
we just ate hash browns in a nativity scene with baby jesus
Well, if worst comes to worst, I have pictures of his penis that I can put on the internet
The appetizer at the dinner I went to tonight was Klonopin and a Bloody Mary.
He told me he loved me...but added "you crazy bitch" at the end. Does it still count???
My brain is a dvd screensaver and I'm allowed to have a good thought when it hits the corner
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