I found somebody to have a 3 sum with
shutup! Who?!?
Hahaha April fools!
I like it. Barfy the gin-flavoured Assman
I walked out of the bathroom and both of you girls were giving the gay guy head. I was like, "laaaterrr."
i just stepped in cum. i hate you.
Thats what happens when you don't swallow.
I guess I should mention that I have already fucked the Fed Ex guy.
That changes everything.
Theres been so much buildup for our genitals to meet, one or both of us is sure to be disappointed.
Of course I'm not above using aladdin and pot to get laid, this is america
Peanut butter balls.
IF YOU EVEN COME NEAR MY BALLS AGAIN I SWEAR TO GOD
Day 1 of the Fuck Your Ex weekend has been productive. Already boned Steph and we're both still glad we arnt together anymore.
So this was during drunk golfing. She started wacking me off on the ninth hole and an old couple rolls up next to us. And Says "hey gu- oh my golly" and while my penis is in her hand I'm like "sorry you guys can play through"
he came to me for relationship advice and we ended up fucking in my backseat
I'm bathroom at buffalo wild wings
I think incapable of making pants work send help
He stopped mid sex to pour wine in my mouth...
Marry him.
I've amended my previous statement: I'm not allowed to put in my two weeks till I ask out the waitress. Now I have motivation on two levels
My first hangover at work. I'm officially an adult.
Randomize
