I've never watched DWTS before, but this show's got Pamela Anderson, Erin Andrews and Brooke Burke: 3 of my top 10 all time most masturbated to women.
I hit her tiny dog with a horseshoe an hour ago. Her and her mom cried as it laid on the ground shaking. Im drunk.
its likemy ribs anf my hesrt aew cuddlingn
I assume it was your influence that had me go from DD to waking up out on the deck with one eyebrow shaved off??
Im having a christmas reunion party tonight. Last year i ate my own contact. We'll see how this year goes
I'm going to go out on a limb and say last night was a success, also the neighbors are counting down the days until we move out.
The things happening in my intestines right now should only ever happen at truck stops and frat houses.
I'm two shots in and wandering around Barnes and Noble with $58 in singles.
I'm a great relationship counselor. My vagina will let you know if your relationship is gonna work or not.
I had to replace her wine with red vitamin water. So if she’s alive, you can thank me
You know why I love being a regular at this bar? It's because at a certain point last call is only a suggestion.
I haven't lost it. I know I'm not a prophet. It was a joke.
After the edible you claimed you were talking to my cat. We're in our 30s now, what was once cute is now a liability.
I hope you know, that by sending me a cat meme back, you've entered in a cat picture battle; which never has an end in sight.
The duel has begun.
I took advantage of the fact that my mentee had to go to the bathroom to throw up in the other stall. I'm going to hell for being hungover at an elementary school.
Do you think Root Touch Up or Just for Men would work better on pubes?
Randomize
