He cooked the food on a paper plate in the oven.
And then I have a slight inkling that I went up to the bar and tried to order the bartender.
Theyr drawing diagrams to try to explain to me how high they are
Is it standard protocol to defriend someone after they give you chlamydia?
My brother brings gifts into my room to wrap them. It's a pizza cutter and a box of condoms..
we were doing it doggy-style and i felt him pop that pimple on my back.I have mixed feelings about it
she said we were using the spray butter as air freshener
Do any of you want to be on a three way call with me while this girl masturbates in 10 min? You can't talk
my tonsil wound opened up during the kegstand but i stopped it with a popsicle
I can not believe he edited a picture of our three way and made it his profile picture
We started a fund for a baby in a wine glass, I think we're pretty responsible.
you know that australian accents are like the bat signal to my vagina
so, i guess i gotta chill on showing up to work hungover... someone anonymously left a bible in my work mailbox (no one else got one)
I was just seen throwin up on the bookstore building near a trashcan by parents. Naturally I throw a thumbs up and say go college
yes we're having sex but I'm texting you...so what does that tell you?
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