I think we need to take a brake
What upsets me the most about that is that you spelt it 'brake'
i forgot how awkward it is to meet new people sober
We have sex, then he cooks. It's like a fantasy.
We need to get her some penis inspired head protection.
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When it gets to the point that I'm more comfortable being naked at his house than my own, it's time to readdress the fuckbuddyship.
"thanks for the sex" was written in lipstick on my bathroom mirror. i'm officially done with random hook ups.
I've decided he is effectively a mouth, hands and cock held together by bad ideas and compliments, and I'm OK with that.
Did you know that if you chase vodka with cheap red wine it tastes exactly like college alcoholism?
my mom said i came home and fell asleep on the floor. like right in front of her.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he came to me for relationship advice and we ended up fucking in my backseat
Living alone for four weeks has given me unrealistic expectations of pantslessness.
He tried to get me to go back to his place on the condition that he has 6 cats. I was very tempted but I said no. Hoping to go see the cats tomorrow
Drunk within and hour of coming home from work, merry christmas bitch
It was rocky mountain showdown of course we got shitfaced and talked about eating buffaloes
the cops drove by and you were on your back in the middle of the side walk with your arms and legs in the air yelling that you were a dead bug .
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