What's the politest way to tell someone that you're only interested in them when they're naked, and even then it's just like a passing "meh?"
i love that we sang a whole new world together while you carried me through campus
Gross thing of the day...i got cum in my new boots
mimosa in my stainless steel water bottle. going green is not that bad.
She compares her life to Teen Mom. She's 28.
He wants to make love to me in a sea of paint and wash my tears away with the brushes surrounding us..I've known him for 2 days.
I'm pretty sure you called me last night and screamed that she was force-feeding you a bagel.
Its 6 am and me and the girl in the next apartment have been taking turns puking and yelling "never agaaaain" thru the walls.
You drank everything last night. It was like this huge deconstructed long island that went on for 5 hours
We're already drunk. 4 hours to go still. And there's a bear advisory. TOP WEEKEND.
I'm tellin ya, let the nipple get some air, they'll hire u on the spot, lawyers love a little nip
Note to self...boner negates all verbal agreements ...got it
I hope you get stoned and think that you're a seal in shark infested waters
Yeah last night got weird fast. No lie, a kid pulled a butt-plug with a tail out of his ass.
You know he wants it bad when he starts going door to door for condoms.
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