meow
WTF. STOP SENDING ME ANIMAL NOISES. ITS FUCKING WEIRD.
At barnes & noble, drinking beer out of thermoses, lookin legit.
i'm pretty sure i lost all sex appeal when he caught me peeing in his bushes
Hhahaha he is. Omg the new polish friend just took his pants off in front of me. There is something wrong with this nationality.
I think I've reached that age where I should start dating "congrats" and not "are you keeping it?"
He's in the hospital yelling at his brother to at least have stuck something "normal" up his ass.
Again?
I never thought I would be having sex behind a shower curtain that wasn't in a bathroom.
i remember going to sleep after the 4th time i threw up this morning and hoping i didn't have to again because then it would be uneven between saturday and sunday. my ocd is getting out of control
I think the worst was the guy who sent me YouTube videos about how age doesn't matter, and then a link for natural breast enhancements. Kill me.
Apparently I called him, said "vodka" and then hung up on him.
I just puke and rallied at my anniversary dinner #winning
I just watched will sing pure imagination from willy wonka and then blow a banana
Honey...this isn't my 20's. This is my 30's. I paid for this house and these expensive ass sheets to fuck in them. Get your ass over here.
Dad hid the hash somewhere in my room and wont tell me where it is until i clean it. My room is spotless. The hash was on the ceiling fan...
He sent me the milestone first dick pic this morning, it looked like a baby's fist holding a tree trunk. I'm frightened and aroused in equal measure.
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