Let me rephrase. Would it display my intentions too much if i walked all the way across my office and into the bathroom carrying my book
Do you have any idea how hard it is to cum to Chingy?!
This kind of poor decision making requires a real cup, not a mason jar.
I feel like banging her is an expected thing. But banging you would be like getting a 36 on the ACT.
you know it's time to start studying when you've procrastinated to the point where you're reading your roommate's ex-boyfriend's wall posts from 2006.
My dad just gifted me an alaskan flag he stole from the govenor's mansion. He said it was to hang on the wall at 3316, to start a morning ritual. Then he mimed kegstands and vomiting. Senior year will be epic.
I think they can follow the trail of blood to my house if they have a problem with me taking a dip in their hot tub last night b4 stepping on a broken bottle
i love when the champions come out to play im bringin the shock collar this weekend
Having to grow a landing strip to cover the bruises from pole dancing. Thanks for the birthday present, but next time, maybe just a gift card?
why does drunk me think that doing things like throwing up on my desk and all over my 15 page lab report is okay
He skipped an important family function with his dying father to fuck me. Terrible human, amazing fuck buddy.
It's like I'm getting a welcome home parade with sex!
Why so philosophical about cake and sex this morning?
I hope a pyrotechnic goes off in your asshole and seals it shut for life.
Me too.
i'm in a very strange mood rn i'm listening to bruno mars??? am i ok????
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