I have before 2 am pics and after 2am pics, which do you want to see first?
I learned nothing from that class except drinking and chemistry go together great.
just fucked my old babysitter, gotta love block parties
if you count grabbing my crotch as an introduction then yeah i got a couple of those tonight
we were both as far on opposite edges of my bed as possible this morning. id say work is gonna be a little uncomfortable from now on
ummm i just drove by ur house and ur passed out on the porch. please call me when u get this
I have a video (on my shattered iphone) of a random DJ at some bar giving me a birthday shoutout and texts from random numbers talking about birthday sex. My birthday is in April... Happy birthday to me?
I slept with him that night and I'm not sure if my lack of enthusiasm was obvious but I found him eating ice cream in the bathtub the next morning. Mom will be so proud.
i'm sad to say... seems like women around here set up their armageddon booty calls ahead of time. wanna fill all these condoms with tequila and head downtown???
He let me keep my Michael Jordan Bulls jersey on during sex.
I would have dumped her already but between the 4 hr bjs and our shared love of enjoying thirsty Thursday naked while watching basketball I'd say its the best shot at love ill ever have
you grabbed the breathalyzer at dinner, blew a 0.20 and told the waitress you'd eat her ass
This is the second time this month a hookup cried when I left...bro get your shit together bar does NOT equal wife 😬
i ordered what the bartender said was called a pink cock, and kept saying it tastes like a disney princess. thats how my 21st bday went
How was it?
i think i smell bacon but im to sore to walk downstairs. that kinda night
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